Glee

I genuinely despair at this show, yet it is so painfully addictive that I can't not watch.

Britney episode = genius. Realistically though, that was only because of Britney herself, Brittany and Santana. I hate Mr Schu. I mean, I actually want to throw him to the ground and press my knee into his throat until he suffocates. There is not one thing attractive about that man. Not one measly thing. He thinks he's Justin Timberlake. News flash, you're about 47 years old and JT has ruled pop since the age of about 6. Plus, forgetting the tragic incident in which he was forced to regress into his 15-year-old self for a part in "Best Picture", The Social Network, even JT has realised that hair like that is doing no one any favours. I HATE YOU! I hope his music career dies on its arse. Which it will.

Oh, and Lea Michele... After witnessing the genius that was Brittany nailing 'I'm a Slave 4 U' and making me vow to run for 5 hours a day whilst doing stomach crunches, then watching her nail it again with Santana, 'Baby, One More Time' was just embarrassing. OK, so I enjoyed the Britney miming, clever, but seriously, she needs to learn not to take herself so seriously. You're in Glee, not Schindler's List! (Apologies, but it was the most serious film I could think of off the top of my head). She and Finn make me so angry. How did he get cast. He's genuinely a different form of human compared to everyone else. I'm sure he's probably 6'2" or something, but he looks about 67 foot tall and about 6 foot wide. AND HE CAN'T DANCE! Please stop making the poor boy dance. Slash, he's about 35 as well. Rachel and Finn need some kind of serious character overhaul, because not only are they painful when they're on their own, but together they actually make me want to go outside and hurt children in the street. Just find something small and kick it until it cries. Hideous.

Apart from Brittany and her amazing abs, and Santana being amazing in general and the genius scripting that came out of both their mouths, there is one other thing that rescued this episode...

Two words: John Stamos. I love him. I genuinely adore that man, and what's even better about him is that when he's not casually saving lives of the people of Chicago, or helping to parent the Olsen twins, he's making Will Schuester look like even more of a dick than he usually does. He's so fabulous with his tan and his crisp shirts and that hair. Oh, John Stamos. What an icon.

I would just like to apologise for the poor quality of this post, I am currently watching Tool Academy, quite possibly the most excellent show ever, and getting distracted. My brain is torn between images of John Stamos and the tool that's just announced that he has kids with another woman despite swearing that he didn't to his girlfriend. Brilliant. John Stamos is winning amazingly enough. But I vowed I wouldn't watch this genius tonight due to the ridiculous lack of sleep from last night's poor attempt at an award's ceremony (that's right Golden Globes, I'm still enraged) but it's so humorous.

SLASH! It would appear next week's episode of Glee is about Jesus. Excellent.

Anyhow, I am now eagerly awaiting the torture that is 902106574836 tomorrow night. It's tragic that I've restrained myself from watching it all online so that I'd have something to look forward to during term time. Mr Schu and Annie 'I casually killed a man and no one cares' Wilson. Kill me now. Oh, wait. I've got John Stamos.