X Factor is a physical beast. I freakin' love it. OK, so half the people I hate got through to Judge's Houses, but so did all the people I did like, of course I know none of their names. The man with the hat, the scouse one, the man-band and of course, Justin Bieber. You may know Justin Bieber as that annoying one that auditioned 2 years ago and made it through to Simon's house, but messed it up major by singing Take That and forgeting the words or something. For one, no one should ever attempt to sing Take That unless your name is Gary Barlow, and two, he was about 3 at the time and not even cute or endearing in anyway. Now, Liam Payne is back as Justin Bieber. I feel as though someone should tell him that Stars in their Eyes ended before he was born and that this is a competition to 'find talent'. Slash, make Simon Cowell shit loads of cash. But I love him! I can't even rememeber if he is any good, all I can see when I look at him is Bieber, and I love Bieber. So when Justin Bieber failed to get through, which was obvious when Lewis Hamilton's girlfriend was like 'Simon, we should totes switch up the categories' and Simon was all like, 'Yeah, that'll make people watch', I was dev-patelled. But I should have known! I feel a failure for not even attempting to think ahead and predict that Simon would, as he does every single year, get all the semi-good ones back and make them into bands that will never ever ever work. And so was born the Justin Bieber Boyband.
The Justin Bieber Boyband are going to be absolutely genius. They're all about 12 and not half as talented as the Bieber himself. There is a reason people haven't pelted that child to the ground with stones, and that is because however much you may want to hurt him, he's just too darn good. These kids aren't. If Simon makes them sing anything from High School Musical I will cry. Actually shed tears of disappointment. But everyone will love it. But, as was pointed out to me today, that Zain or whatever his name is, refused outright to take part in the dance task at Boot Camp. The Justin Bieber Boyband will dance. They will have to, and if he ruins my plan for them to make it all the way through to the final, just so Simon can ring the Biebs and get them to perform with him, then I will hunt him down. That is assuming that Bieber Fever will still be rife by Christmas (which it will, as long as there are teenage girls and weirdos like me). I can see it now, they're going to be as annoying as Jedward or as shit as those kids who thought they were Westlife on the last Britain's Got Talent. I think I'd love it if they were awful just as much as I'd enjoy seeing them with Justin Bieber. I also can't wait to see what God awful name they'll come up with. Something as cliched and cheesy as possible.
Ultimately, they stand absolutely no chance whatsoever. It was almost cruel to put them through.
Monday 27 September 2010
Sunday 26 September 2010
X Factor
I hate this bit of the X Factor. I hate the way they changed the auditions to be all Britain's Got Talent-esq because it is pointless and irritating. I couldn't care less about the auto-tuning 'scandal' because it was not a scandal at all. A scandal would have been that none of the people who auditioned were actually human and they were actually alien life forms that Simon Cowell managed to create in his lab in LA. Even then though, everything Simon says or does is usually for the good of humanity, so I would have accepted it.
Last night was Boot Camp. I can deal more with Boot Camp then I can with the stupid auditions, but realistically, we're all just waiting for Judge's Houses so we can see what delights Sinitta will be wearing as she 'helps' Simon. Sometimes I think she's the best thing about the show as she strolls around the pool wearing leaves whilst some poor contestant is left to melt in the LA heat in front of the Cowell. It's just excellent. I also love that Louis will usually always bring out a Boyzone or Westlife member, who has absolutely no interest in the process, but he's really let me down this year with Sharon Osbourne. No one cares! Anyway, back to Boot Camp.
I hate that Cher girl, I hate that one that thinks she's Madonna circa 1986/ Freddie Mercury and has a record deal that everyone seems to have forgotten about. I hated that boy who refused to dance and then got another chance! As if! I love Simon when he's being all fatherly, but Simon's at his best when he takes no prisoners, when he beats people down with nothing but his painfully accurate words. Not giving them another chance! And that prostitute girl, Chloe. How has she been given so many chances!? I know Simon feels sorry for her, but she turned up late reeking of booze and vomit! Ewwww! Having said all this, when it ended last night, I was desperate to find out who went through to Judge's Houses, and of course who gets which category. They're always disappointed which is hilarious.
Simon Cowell is the most amazing human being ever. He would be the most amazing uncle ever! He'd spoil you so much but with enough tough love as to not ruin you as a person. It's my dream. And when he winks at the contestants! What a sign of approval! I'd kill for a wink from Simon Cowell. What he says goes. He's always right, even when he's wrong. I don't even know why people try and disagree with him, other than to get their fat faces onto TV. It's like when people argue with the police. YOU'RE NEVER GOING TO WIN! You will get arrested and you will end up being convicted of the murder you comitted. It's just the way the cookie crumbles. He's like some sort of music industry God. He should have been Prime Minister. Yes, I get that all the 'cool' artists think that he's ruining music for the world and ruining culture and society in the process. But if they're that arsed, why go and perform on the show? Oh, I know! All that cash Simon wafts in their face. Idiots. Even as I write this I can hear Mark Ronson's voice on the television declaring his admiration for Simon, even though he thinks the show is craptacular. Simon is King, you will always lose, end of conversation.
But in the end, the genius of X Factor, apart from Our Lord Almighty Simon Cowell, is that even when it's so bad you want to hurt yourself just as some sort of distraction, you can't stop watching it. It''s so addictive. And I love it! My main prediction so far is not about any of the contestants, but that Take That will do their first live performance as a 5 piece on one of the live finals. If Simon can't pull that off, I think my faith in him and my sheer adoration of his being will decrease into non-existance. It's the perfect opportunity. Although I am aware that Gary and Robbie are performing on Strictly at some stage... Come on Si, pull it out the bag; work the magic that all your millions have provided. I bet he will. And it will be excellent.
Last night was Boot Camp. I can deal more with Boot Camp then I can with the stupid auditions, but realistically, we're all just waiting for Judge's Houses so we can see what delights Sinitta will be wearing as she 'helps' Simon. Sometimes I think she's the best thing about the show as she strolls around the pool wearing leaves whilst some poor contestant is left to melt in the LA heat in front of the Cowell. It's just excellent. I also love that Louis will usually always bring out a Boyzone or Westlife member, who has absolutely no interest in the process, but he's really let me down this year with Sharon Osbourne. No one cares! Anyway, back to Boot Camp.
I hate that Cher girl, I hate that one that thinks she's Madonna circa 1986/ Freddie Mercury and has a record deal that everyone seems to have forgotten about. I hated that boy who refused to dance and then got another chance! As if! I love Simon when he's being all fatherly, but Simon's at his best when he takes no prisoners, when he beats people down with nothing but his painfully accurate words. Not giving them another chance! And that prostitute girl, Chloe. How has she been given so many chances!? I know Simon feels sorry for her, but she turned up late reeking of booze and vomit! Ewwww! Having said all this, when it ended last night, I was desperate to find out who went through to Judge's Houses, and of course who gets which category. They're always disappointed which is hilarious.
Simon Cowell is the most amazing human being ever. He would be the most amazing uncle ever! He'd spoil you so much but with enough tough love as to not ruin you as a person. It's my dream. And when he winks at the contestants! What a sign of approval! I'd kill for a wink from Simon Cowell. What he says goes. He's always right, even when he's wrong. I don't even know why people try and disagree with him, other than to get their fat faces onto TV. It's like when people argue with the police. YOU'RE NEVER GOING TO WIN! You will get arrested and you will end up being convicted of the murder you comitted. It's just the way the cookie crumbles. He's like some sort of music industry God. He should have been Prime Minister. Yes, I get that all the 'cool' artists think that he's ruining music for the world and ruining culture and society in the process. But if they're that arsed, why go and perform on the show? Oh, I know! All that cash Simon wafts in their face. Idiots. Even as I write this I can hear Mark Ronson's voice on the television declaring his admiration for Simon, even though he thinks the show is craptacular. Simon is King, you will always lose, end of conversation.
But in the end, the genius of X Factor, apart from Our Lord Almighty Simon Cowell, is that even when it's so bad you want to hurt yourself just as some sort of distraction, you can't stop watching it. It''s so addictive. And I love it! My main prediction so far is not about any of the contestants, but that Take That will do their first live performance as a 5 piece on one of the live finals. If Simon can't pull that off, I think my faith in him and my sheer adoration of his being will decrease into non-existance. It's the perfect opportunity. Although I am aware that Gary and Robbie are performing on Strictly at some stage... Come on Si, pull it out the bag; work the magic that all your millions have provided. I bet he will. And it will be excellent.
Thursday 23 September 2010
The best show on TV
Southland is genius. I actually adore it, and there is not one ounce of irony in that statement. Like with most shows, I started watching due to the fact that Ryan Atwood (or Ben McKenzie if you live in the real world) was one of the main characters. "Hmmm... A cop show..." I thought. And cop show it is, but it ain't just any cop show, oh no. Now, I love a crime drama, I love a murder mystery, I love anything where John Nettles plays some sort of law inforcer, but there is absolutely nothing cheesy about this show. It is just sheer genius.
From the way it's filmed (which is unbelievable) to the storylines, I'm literally addicted. It's gotten to the stage where I'm traipsing the internet trying to find my next hit, and I hate doing that. I can't stand watching shows online, and don't even get me started with Megavideo... That's why I'm so glad it's finally Thursday and I can watch it in all it's glory on a proper TV, providing the weather doesn't mess with the signal on More 4. I've found now that I'll quite happily wish the week away, just so I can watch the next episode. It's dark, surprisingly so, but it feels real and it gives me faith in the police, even if I don't live in LA and Ryan Atwood isn't even real let alone an actual policeman. But last week's episode was so freakin' emotional! Poor Detective Sammy! He gets way too involved in the lives of those Mexican kids and he always ends up hurt! And I officially hate his wife. He could do so much better, and he knows it. I mean, she's there, taking pictures of gang members and smoking weed with a 17 year old thief who then proceeds to steal her stuff and then she moans about how it's just because she's bored when poor Detective Sammy is sobbing due to the fact that the kid he tried to help ended up killing someone after all even though he tried his God damned hardest to make him go back to school! She's such a stupid bitch! I hope that she ends up arrested so she can't get Sammy into any more trouble, I actually think it would ruin my life if he got into any trouble over her. She's not even pretty, or sane.
God this show is good! I don't know what I'm going to do when it ends. I'm totally Wikipedia-ing it up, right now.
UPDATE: I cannot deal with the fact that there are only 6 episodes a season and I have to wait until next year before I get the next one. Not cool. I'm writing this whilst watching the finale of season 2 and I'm already suffering withdrawals.
From the way it's filmed (which is unbelievable) to the storylines, I'm literally addicted. It's gotten to the stage where I'm traipsing the internet trying to find my next hit, and I hate doing that. I can't stand watching shows online, and don't even get me started with Megavideo... That's why I'm so glad it's finally Thursday and I can watch it in all it's glory on a proper TV, providing the weather doesn't mess with the signal on More 4. I've found now that I'll quite happily wish the week away, just so I can watch the next episode. It's dark, surprisingly so, but it feels real and it gives me faith in the police, even if I don't live in LA and Ryan Atwood isn't even real let alone an actual policeman. But last week's episode was so freakin' emotional! Poor Detective Sammy! He gets way too involved in the lives of those Mexican kids and he always ends up hurt! And I officially hate his wife. He could do so much better, and he knows it. I mean, she's there, taking pictures of gang members and smoking weed with a 17 year old thief who then proceeds to steal her stuff and then she moans about how it's just because she's bored when poor Detective Sammy is sobbing due to the fact that the kid he tried to help ended up killing someone after all even though he tried his God damned hardest to make him go back to school! She's such a stupid bitch! I hope that she ends up arrested so she can't get Sammy into any more trouble, I actually think it would ruin my life if he got into any trouble over her. She's not even pretty, or sane.
God this show is good! I don't know what I'm going to do when it ends. I'm totally Wikipedia-ing it up, right now.
UPDATE: I cannot deal with the fact that there are only 6 episodes a season and I have to wait until next year before I get the next one. Not cool. I'm writing this whilst watching the finale of season 2 and I'm already suffering withdrawals.
Wednesday 22 September 2010
Two birds with one stone
Due to the fact that Ugly Betty and Seven Days were equally as perculiar, I'm writing about them in one post to save time and allow the frustration to flow.
I don't even know where to start with Ugly Betty. I don't even know why I watch it. Well, I started watching it because Vanessa Williams sang Colours of the Wind from Pocahontas and Eric Mabius had guest starred in The OC, but it was really good in the old days, when they were all fresh with ideas and Betty was truly hideous. (No one has braces for 4 years, no one.) The only decent thing about this episode was Mark and that was only really because he did a dance and then fell over. Not particularly innovative, but amusing nontheless. Wilhelmina was, of course, fabulous, as was Claire Meade who has bizarrely become my favourite character since Daniel went all soppy/lost his mind and sold his soul to the most pointless cult ever. I mean, they weren't even taking his money! Just drugging him for absolutely no reason! I am pleased that they've stopped dying his hair that awful orangey brown though, that was God awful.
Even though I know this is the last series of Ugly Betty, and for that I am quite relieved as I will no longer just watch it because I feel I have to, but I just don't know where it's going to go. I hear you, I could read spoilers online, but to be completely honest, I really couldn't care less. They've run out of ideas and realised the Betty is actually a really annyoing main character. They should bring that sexy one from CSI who taught Betty how to drive back for more episodes, that would make it a bit more interesting. Although, his storyline was that he taught Betty how to drive... Two words, SNOOZE FEST.
Seven Days was the weirdest, most pointless show I've ever seen. I love reality TV, but all that this show proved was that MTV was right to script The Hills. People's lives really aren't that interesting. Slash, no one cares. If it was celebrities flashing the cash and doing crazy things for publicity, then yes, people would be interested. But it's not. It's just normal people, who, by the way, aren't even nice or funny in anyway, doing boring jobs or sitting on the sofa. No one wants to watch that! "Oh I'm too rich! Oh I'm too poor! Ohhhhhhhh a uigfbsarbvaeiubvrlksubeifvusb!" I don't care if it's meant to be all new, clever and innovative with the public interaction aspect, but I don't even know what people would comment on. Literally nothing happened. And it felt as if it was never going to end! What was with the lead up to the ad break? It seemed to just stop half way through someone's conversation. And more random people kept turning up. No one cares if that man can't get a mortgage for the flats he wants to buy. No one cares if those 'models' hate the dresses they're asked to wear. I couldn't even find comedy in the fact that one of them cried because the other one didn't like her hair. If that had happened to Lauren and Audrina, that would have been golden. The best bit in the whole show was when those guys were walking down the road looking all gansta and talking about the Pope, "Oh yeah, and he drives like that bulletproof Batmobile".
I just don't get it. In any way. I'm not even sure if there is anything to get. It is boring and stupid and Channel 4 should never have gotten rid of Big Brother. Fact.
I don't even know where to start with Ugly Betty. I don't even know why I watch it. Well, I started watching it because Vanessa Williams sang Colours of the Wind from Pocahontas and Eric Mabius had guest starred in The OC, but it was really good in the old days, when they were all fresh with ideas and Betty was truly hideous. (No one has braces for 4 years, no one.) The only decent thing about this episode was Mark and that was only really because he did a dance and then fell over. Not particularly innovative, but amusing nontheless. Wilhelmina was, of course, fabulous, as was Claire Meade who has bizarrely become my favourite character since Daniel went all soppy/lost his mind and sold his soul to the most pointless cult ever. I mean, they weren't even taking his money! Just drugging him for absolutely no reason! I am pleased that they've stopped dying his hair that awful orangey brown though, that was God awful.
Even though I know this is the last series of Ugly Betty, and for that I am quite relieved as I will no longer just watch it because I feel I have to, but I just don't know where it's going to go. I hear you, I could read spoilers online, but to be completely honest, I really couldn't care less. They've run out of ideas and realised the Betty is actually a really annyoing main character. They should bring that sexy one from CSI who taught Betty how to drive back for more episodes, that would make it a bit more interesting. Although, his storyline was that he taught Betty how to drive... Two words, SNOOZE FEST.
Seven Days was the weirdest, most pointless show I've ever seen. I love reality TV, but all that this show proved was that MTV was right to script The Hills. People's lives really aren't that interesting. Slash, no one cares. If it was celebrities flashing the cash and doing crazy things for publicity, then yes, people would be interested. But it's not. It's just normal people, who, by the way, aren't even nice or funny in anyway, doing boring jobs or sitting on the sofa. No one wants to watch that! "Oh I'm too rich! Oh I'm too poor! Ohhhhhhhh a uigfbsarbvaeiubvrlksubeifvusb!" I don't care if it's meant to be all new, clever and innovative with the public interaction aspect, but I don't even know what people would comment on. Literally nothing happened. And it felt as if it was never going to end! What was with the lead up to the ad break? It seemed to just stop half way through someone's conversation. And more random people kept turning up. No one cares if that man can't get a mortgage for the flats he wants to buy. No one cares if those 'models' hate the dresses they're asked to wear. I couldn't even find comedy in the fact that one of them cried because the other one didn't like her hair. If that had happened to Lauren and Audrina, that would have been golden. The best bit in the whole show was when those guys were walking down the road looking all gansta and talking about the Pope, "Oh yeah, and he drives like that bulletproof Batmobile".
I just don't get it. In any way. I'm not even sure if there is anything to get. It is boring and stupid and Channel 4 should never have gotten rid of Big Brother. Fact.
Dear Josh Schwartz...
I love you. You gave me The OC, and for that I will be eternally grateful, but WTF?! You can try all you want to fool us with the pretty clothes and the sparkles and the money, but I see right through you. I mean, why are Serena and Blair even friends?! No! It would never happen! Get rid of Serena, I hate her. Seriously, just write her out. And get a new baddie! I'm sure Michelle Tratenberg is thrilled with the role, but does she really need to appear every third episode to 'stir it up'? Erm... let me think about that... NO!
Love from Alice.
PS. Bring back The OC.
The first episode of a new season is meant to be exciting, not a complete and utter snoozefest. Yes, it was in Paris. Yes, there were nice clothes, but even then most of them bordered on hideous. If Gossip Girl is good for one thing it's nice clothes, yet Serena insists, INSISTS on dressing like a complete slag all the time. WHERE WERE HER PANTS? Why is everyone in love with her? Why? Yes she is beautiful, but she is so far beyond annyoing it hurts. I can't even begin to go into how much she irritates me because I'll throw the computer through the window, run downstairs and stamp on it repeatedly. I have, however, been led to believe that the next episode is DA BOMB, which fills me with hope. But even if it was as tremendously boring as this episode, I'd watch it religiously anyway, just in fear of actually missing something good. I still have faith, Josh, don't you worry.
Love from Alice.
PS. Bring back The OC.
The first episode of a new season is meant to be exciting, not a complete and utter snoozefest. Yes, it was in Paris. Yes, there were nice clothes, but even then most of them bordered on hideous. If Gossip Girl is good for one thing it's nice clothes, yet Serena insists, INSISTS on dressing like a complete slag all the time. WHERE WERE HER PANTS? Why is everyone in love with her? Why? Yes she is beautiful, but she is so far beyond annyoing it hurts. I can't even begin to go into how much she irritates me because I'll throw the computer through the window, run downstairs and stamp on it repeatedly. I have, however, been led to believe that the next episode is DA BOMB, which fills me with hope. But even if it was as tremendously boring as this episode, I'd watch it religiously anyway, just in fear of actually missing something good. I still have faith, Josh, don't you worry.
Bieber Not-so-much Fever
Whilst I am painfully aware that I am currently blogging about televisual treats of the past, I've got to talk about Justin Bieber's performance at the VMAs last week. It was beyond excellent. I have this love/hate relationship with Bieber where I hate him for making me love his irritably catchy songs. If I was 12, I would worship the Bieber ground that he walks on, it's just a shame he's got the kind of face you want to throw rocks at.
The VMAs in general were a let down. I don't even know why I get excited about them anymore. It's always obvious who's going to win, the hosts get continuously irritating and the performances more and more scripted. I have to admit that Chelsea Handler's sketches with the Lohan and Bieber were highly amusing, but for the most part, she was painful. It felt as though she was just saying random words and hoping they'd make a punchline. But this is completely beside the Justin Bieber point.
His performance was my absolute fave of the night. Coming in on his car, running through a crowd of screaming girls who were obviously actors but genuinely wanted to grab hold of him and squeeze him, changing from a red bomber jacket to a way cooler black one, slapping a cool cap on his head and miming his way through a medeley of all his classics whilst children no older than 3 were dancing round him in what I'm assuming was an attempt to make him look like a regular sized human being. It was just excellent. And then he did his drum solo... Oh the drum solo! I was actually quite impressed with his drumming, but when he dropped one of his sticks, oh the hilarity! Disappointingly, he pulled it back, finished in the 'coolest' of styles and ran to hug his entourage of 45 year old men, large enough to kill bears, and who obviously couldn't care less about Bieber's success, as 25million tons of ticker tape fell onto the crowd of fitting girls.
I don't think I'll ever get bored of it, ever. Just genius.
Watch it here, I promsie it's worth it:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VNMyCHmfGEY
The VMAs in general were a let down. I don't even know why I get excited about them anymore. It's always obvious who's going to win, the hosts get continuously irritating and the performances more and more scripted. I have to admit that Chelsea Handler's sketches with the Lohan and Bieber were highly amusing, but for the most part, she was painful. It felt as though she was just saying random words and hoping they'd make a punchline. But this is completely beside the Justin Bieber point.
His performance was my absolute fave of the night. Coming in on his car, running through a crowd of screaming girls who were obviously actors but genuinely wanted to grab hold of him and squeeze him, changing from a red bomber jacket to a way cooler black one, slapping a cool cap on his head and miming his way through a medeley of all his classics whilst children no older than 3 were dancing round him in what I'm assuming was an attempt to make him look like a regular sized human being. It was just excellent. And then he did his drum solo... Oh the drum solo! I was actually quite impressed with his drumming, but when he dropped one of his sticks, oh the hilarity! Disappointingly, he pulled it back, finished in the 'coolest' of styles and ran to hug his entourage of 45 year old men, large enough to kill bears, and who obviously couldn't care less about Bieber's success, as 25million tons of ticker tape fell onto the crowd of fitting girls.
I don't think I'll ever get bored of it, ever. Just genius.
Watch it here, I promsie it's worth it:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VNMyCHmfGEY
Tuesday 21 September 2010
Welcome
Hello and welcome to I Miss Brookside, a (hopefully) satirical blog dedicated to critiquing and reviewing TV, film, and pretty much anything else worth commenting on.
I would primarily like the thank Monday night's abismal episode of One Tree Hill for riling me enough to start this blog and vent my frustration. It was just awful. I mean, Ilove One Tree Hill, and I'm not ashamed to admit that depsite the pathetic guest stars, the storylines that make 90210 seem realistic and the fact that every single character now appears to be a celebrity, the worse it gets the more I find myself enjoying it. Now that sappy, pain-in-the-arse Lucas has gone and stopped providing the painful voiceovers that start and end the show with a 'deep and meaningful' but completely irrelevant and futile look at the world, I no longer want to throw things at the television screen. The acting isn't even that bad, but the script is...
Monday saw international singing sensation, Hayley James Scott (the most famous singer in the whole entire world ever) throw an 80s themed dance at Tree Hill High. "Why?!" you may ask. I couldn't honestly tell you, other than the fact that the episode was some sort of John Hughes tribute. My favourite thing about Hayley 'I'm so famous' Scott's dance was that no one seemed arsed that she was this huge international pop-star, casually throwing a particularly crappy high school dance. And, even more amusing, was that no one remembered her birthday. Not her son, her best friends, not even her huge following of hardcore fans that for some unbeknownst reason sell out all the gigs. Not even her sister. Poor Hayley James Scott. And speaking of her sister, why was Quinn so obsessed with crimping her hair? If you're that desperate, DO IT! She didn't even look 80s, more 'what were you thinking?'
Of course, my favourite character is Julian, the saviour of the show, the Christ of Tree Hill. Whilst I'm still trying to work out why the script writers thought it would ever be a good idea to have him and Brooke break up over nothing, I am revelling in the costume department's interesting attempt to dress him as Duckie from Pretty in Pink. Being a die-hard Pretty in Pink fan, I loved it of course, but at the same time, his tiny hat and sunglasses made him look as though he had the head of a giant. And what was Brooke wearing!? Dear God...
Finally, my last complaint about this particular episode was the hideous sound edit towards the end whilst Mouth was talking to that girl from England, or Australia or South Africa or wherever the hell she's from. The music went from blasting over their speech to suddenly fading into the background in the space of a milisecond. It was almost outrageous that they thought they could get away with it.
Overall though, it was pretty entertaining and, as nausea inducing it was when Alex coined the name 'Brulian' which I'm sure was intended in some 'ironic' way, I'm completely and utterly engrossed in their relationship. Perhaps maybe that was a slight exaggeration, but I'm definitely interested enough to continue to watch the show. Although why the writers thought it would be 'cute' to have two characters called Alex, I'll never quite understand. They'll so end up together.
I would primarily like the thank Monday night's abismal episode of One Tree Hill for riling me enough to start this blog and vent my frustration. It was just awful. I mean, Ilove One Tree Hill, and I'm not ashamed to admit that depsite the pathetic guest stars, the storylines that make 90210 seem realistic and the fact that every single character now appears to be a celebrity, the worse it gets the more I find myself enjoying it. Now that sappy, pain-in-the-arse Lucas has gone and stopped providing the painful voiceovers that start and end the show with a 'deep and meaningful' but completely irrelevant and futile look at the world, I no longer want to throw things at the television screen. The acting isn't even that bad, but the script is...
Monday saw international singing sensation, Hayley James Scott (the most famous singer in the whole entire world ever) throw an 80s themed dance at Tree Hill High. "Why?!" you may ask. I couldn't honestly tell you, other than the fact that the episode was some sort of John Hughes tribute. My favourite thing about Hayley 'I'm so famous' Scott's dance was that no one seemed arsed that she was this huge international pop-star, casually throwing a particularly crappy high school dance. And, even more amusing, was that no one remembered her birthday. Not her son, her best friends, not even her huge following of hardcore fans that for some unbeknownst reason sell out all the gigs. Not even her sister. Poor Hayley James Scott. And speaking of her sister, why was Quinn so obsessed with crimping her hair? If you're that desperate, DO IT! She didn't even look 80s, more 'what were you thinking?'
Of course, my favourite character is Julian, the saviour of the show, the Christ of Tree Hill. Whilst I'm still trying to work out why the script writers thought it would ever be a good idea to have him and Brooke break up over nothing, I am revelling in the costume department's interesting attempt to dress him as Duckie from Pretty in Pink. Being a die-hard Pretty in Pink fan, I loved it of course, but at the same time, his tiny hat and sunglasses made him look as though he had the head of a giant. And what was Brooke wearing!? Dear God...
Finally, my last complaint about this particular episode was the hideous sound edit towards the end whilst Mouth was talking to that girl from England, or Australia or South Africa or wherever the hell she's from. The music went from blasting over their speech to suddenly fading into the background in the space of a milisecond. It was almost outrageous that they thought they could get away with it.
Overall though, it was pretty entertaining and, as nausea inducing it was when Alex coined the name 'Brulian' which I'm sure was intended in some 'ironic' way, I'm completely and utterly engrossed in their relationship. Perhaps maybe that was a slight exaggeration, but I'm definitely interested enough to continue to watch the show. Although why the writers thought it would be 'cute' to have two characters called Alex, I'll never quite understand. They'll so end up together.
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